Today, after a long day at work, went tcss with a frnd online. Interestingly brought up a subject... Partner (Spouse/Gf/Bf) vs Pals.
In most of the scenarios, we concluded that the duration we have known our pals are relatively longer as compared to our partner. So technically, we may be closer to them, though not emotionally lah. I mean between pals and partner, these are two different type of attraction (chemistry) mah.
Then he brought up an argument... who do we share our secret or seek advice from more???
Case 1... Suppose there is an disagreement between couples. As rule of thumb, never continue the discussion until both parties cool down as it may lead to argument. So during this chill off period, potentially we tend to share with our pals, not necessary just for advice, comments and next course of actions, or maybe in need for some listening ears. Only after that, we then tend to go back to our partner for further discussion.
Case 2... Should we have some dissatisfaction/complain towards our partner (nothing major but just bugging inside us). Instead of direct confronting them that could either hurt our partner or potentially an argument. Some time even resort to telling white lies to our partner just to avoid some unpleasant experience. But to get it off the chest, we would tend to share it with our pals instead.
Case 3... Continue on the above case, should we have any complain towards our pals, we don't usually share with our partner. Instead, the pals would tend to talk it out and trash is out up front instead. It seems like both similar case but been managed differently.
He even further illustrated the scenario the relationship between parents/child vs child/child's friend. To a certain extent, it does make sense. Based on his argument, we turn to our pals more than towards our partner:p So is this a case that our pals are more forgiving/understanding towards us as compare to our partner?
Btw, our discussion did not end with any concrete conclusion:p Though based on the above scenarios, it may (or had) potentially take place before, but I suppose I would only conclude it just a case of different expectation between these two ppl.
In most of the scenarios, we concluded that the duration we have known our pals are relatively longer as compared to our partner. So technically, we may be closer to them, though not emotionally lah. I mean between pals and partner, these are two different type of attraction (chemistry) mah.
Then he brought up an argument... who do we share our secret or seek advice from more???
Case 1... Suppose there is an disagreement between couples. As rule of thumb, never continue the discussion until both parties cool down as it may lead to argument. So during this chill off period, potentially we tend to share with our pals, not necessary just for advice, comments and next course of actions, or maybe in need for some listening ears. Only after that, we then tend to go back to our partner for further discussion.
Case 2... Should we have some dissatisfaction/complain towards our partner (nothing major but just bugging inside us). Instead of direct confronting them that could either hurt our partner or potentially an argument. Some time even resort to telling white lies to our partner just to avoid some unpleasant experience. But to get it off the chest, we would tend to share it with our pals instead.
Case 3... Continue on the above case, should we have any complain towards our pals, we don't usually share with our partner. Instead, the pals would tend to talk it out and trash is out up front instead. It seems like both similar case but been managed differently.
He even further illustrated the scenario the relationship between parents/child vs child/child's friend. To a certain extent, it does make sense. Based on his argument, we turn to our pals more than towards our partner:p So is this a case that our pals are more forgiving/understanding towards us as compare to our partner?
Btw, our discussion did not end with any concrete conclusion:p Though based on the above scenarios, it may (or had) potentially take place before, but I suppose I would only conclude it just a case of different expectation between these two ppl.
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